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Dec. 20th, 2008 @ 02:09 pm That Damn Toto Song
Current Mood: quixoticquixotic
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So I really have to wait till forever is through before I can get over you. But then again I can just keep you in a special place in my heart, along with my two other could've beens. It is a place I can easily and gladly visit any time I want to and I'll be fine every time I'll do so. I'll pine for you for a while but I'll know when to get my feet back on the ground. It's enough for me to know that you've finally found your happiness, though it still hurts to know and I'm regretful to realize that I'm not part of it.

As you're now safely kept in that special place, I can now look forward to meeting somebody who won't just be a could've been.

Hope springs eternal.
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Jan. 2nd, 2008 @ 02:54 pm No Holiday Hangover
Current Mood: optimisticoptimistic
Yeah, I wanna stay in bed all day but I gotta start the new year right that's why I enthusiastically got to work today though I know there's nothing much to do (official work, that is!). Hope I can keep this upbeat and motivated attitude all year round (I know, I know, it's difficult). That's the best way to prepare myself for the highs and lows that 2008 has in store for me.
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unperturbed
Dec. 23rd, 2007 @ 02:38 pm What a Difference a Year Makes
Current Mood: relievedrelieved
Whew, it sure is!

If around the same time last year I was on the phone with a dear old friend tearily telling her that I had decided to move out a week ahead of schedule, this time around I'm in the office waiting for responses from friends about our Christmas party. Oh, yes, my first Christmas party in Bahrain! It will be held tomorrow, from 10 p.m. onwards; today after hearing Mass, we'll be doing the decorations and checking the sound system. But before that, I have to drop by Marina Mall for some stupid errand in a store there -- just a wrinkle, no need to panic.

I should have panicked last year when I moved in to my new place, a room that until now I sublet from a Sri Lankan couple, and I had exactly one piece of furniture - a mat and suede covered chair that doubles as storage - along with my clothes, shoes and other belongings, but I did not. In fact, I never felt surer of what I was doing though at the same time I never felt scarier. Trust and faith have never made more sense to me than at that moment, which made me realize that I could indeed negotiate any roadblock that I encounter along the way of my chosen itinerant life.
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unperturbed
Nov. 20th, 2007 @ 12:14 pm I'd like to...
Current Mood: pensivepensive
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I'd like to go to New York and spend a year or two either working on my post-grad degree or taking short courses on design and the arts. In between accomplishing those objectives, I will visit MOMA and check out exhibits in galleries; shoot the breeze in Central Park; stitch and bitch in craft stores; watch at least one musical and one straight play each on Broadway, off-Broadway and off-off-Broadway; go to the opera in an opera outfit; search for free shows showcasing all forms of artistic expressions; see David Letterman in action, live; stalk celebrities of note and tail the paparazzi; try out as much tasty treats as possible; save up for a trip to a trendy resto; hunt down fashion and furniture bargains across the city; take a bite of the Big Apple every day.

I'd like to go backpacking for a month in Morocco. I will pretend I'm Ilsa who will bump into Rick in Casablanca; together they will explore this exotic country and each place will bring them unexpected joy and unknown passion.

I'd like to go on a week-long trip to Jordan, where I will buy bottled water from the Jordan River and take a leap of faith in Petra.

I'd like to go to Albay, Bicol and search for the hotel room that offers the best view of the Mayon Volcano. I will lie in my bed gazing at the famed perfect cone that will be framed by the huge capiz window.

I'd like to travel once again to Sagada but this time I will extend my trek to Battad, where I will fall in love anew with the Cordillera Mountain range and experience the most glorious sunrise.

Most of the time, though, I would just like to be with you.
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unperturbed
Nov. 11th, 2007 @ 03:06 pm erase, erase
Current Mood: frustratedfrustrated
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If there's one movie invention that I would like to come alive in real world it is the device used in "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" to erase memories of certain people. Because putting someone out of your mind, as suggested in a heartbreaking song, just won't do. You really need intervention -- medical, electrical, technological, whatever -- to succeed in getting somebody out of your system.

So, if that device is already out in the market, please let me know.
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Aug. 16th, 2007 @ 03:50 pm It's my party; I'll cry if I want to
Current Mood: satisfiedsatisfied
Then again, I don't feel like crying :)

Maybe it's because my hormones are in perfect balance. Maybe I'm just content and happy with my life. Maybe hitting 35 today is not so bad, after all. Whatever. I just feel good right this very moment.

Though I don't believe in permanance, I still hope that it will last.
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Jul. 10th, 2007 @ 03:59 pm the end, really
Current Mood: crushedcrushed
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It's nearly three months since my last post; a lot has happened; my mood is still the same, though -- as far as the subject of my last post is concerned.
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Apr. 18th, 2007 @ 04:24 pm "Don't Ignore the Signs"
Current Mood: crushedcrushed
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That's a line from an email by a love-struck friend.

I've heeded her advice but the outcome is heartbreakingly contradictory to the state where she is now.

What can I say? It truly is the end of the line for us. Come to think of it, there really was no us in the first place. It was just a could-have-been us -- nipped in the bud by a surreal turn of events and even more surreal reaction to it.

Maybe it's not just meant to be. Yeah, right, that's what I always say.

And it's a source of comfort for me somehow.
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Mar. 1st, 2007 @ 04:02 pm somewhere i have never traveled
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Exactly a year ago, I was on my way back home from an almost week-long sojourn to the Cordillera Region.
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Feb. 20th, 2007 @ 04:05 pm p.s. to v-day
Current Mood: lovedloved
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Valentine's Day they say is a celebration of love; thus I commemorated the red letter day by indulging in not one but two of my greatest passions: Cinema and Gael Garcia Bernal (well next to Johnny Depp).

I remember having a blast watching classic Filipino flicks on daytime TV in my childhood and when I hit the teen-age years, I'd get excited whenever recent releases made it to the small screen as my family couldn't afford to go to the movies more than twice a year (once I gave in to my younger brother Dennis' persistent plea to watch "Ninja Kids" because one of its stars was his namesake). But I managed to make more trips to the cinema with my friends, who were usually kind enough to pay for my ticket.

Back then, I was only interested in going to the movies because of the stars and how they relentlessly promoted their projects on every musical-variety program or talk show with a promise to the moviegoers that they would have their money's worth. It was only in college when I started getting curious about the more substantial aspects of filmmaking and as I got to know more about the artform and the artists behind it, I found myself falling in love with cinema.

Gael, on the other hand, had me at hello. He was roguishly winsome in Alfonso Cuaron's "Y Tu Mama Tambien" and heartbreakingly intense in Alejandro Gonzalez IƱarritu's "Amores Perros" but equally brilliant in both films which were released in 2001 and 2000, respectively (I got to see the former first and shortly after, the latter). Though I detested his titular character in Carlos Carrera's "El Crimen del Padre Amaro," I couldn't help raving about his textured and nuanced performance. I have this deep respect for actors with matinee idol good looks who go against type especially if they are truly gifted and giving thespians.

So just imagine how my heart leapt when I read two weeks ago from a magazine that the Bahrain Cinema Club would screen Pedro Almodovar's "La Mala Educacion" on Valentine's Day!
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unperturbed